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Minggu, 11 September 2016

Resident's Life

I am currently in my fourth semester of Internal Medicine residency. And since I've experienced a lot of things with it, I think I have to share you a little about it.

Only a little? Yup as residency is a personal thing. What happened to me might not happen to you as well. So I just want to share you all a little about it from my point of view.

Residency might be a mainstream pathway for some people but in my view, to become a resident means you have more passion in clinical things. And when we talk about passion, we no longer have mainstream word in our dictionary. That's what you want and you set your eyes on it. That's it.

What is so interesting about residency?

Residency is an educational world for adult. You'll find a very different learning situation than the one you got in undergraduate program. And the most interesting part is in residency you teach and are taught at the same time. The biggest enemy you could find is yourself.

How come?

As we get older, our ego seems to get higher as we feel that we've experienced much. We feel so smart and independent. In residency, we'll meet a lot of people with various backgrounds, ages, and characteristics. Sometimes you start it late and you have a bossy senior who is much younger than you and you have to deal with her everyday. Sometimes you start it too soon and you can't resist everything that others ask you to do. Sometimes you're not lucky and your mistake is blown up and you must face an exhausting awkward relationship with your supervisor. The best and also the worst part of residency is you can't lie about yourself here. The big pressure will force you to show who you really are.

Have I ever thought to quit?

I have.. once. That was when  thought that this had been beyond my limit. I just wanted to go anywhere but hospital. But then I thought that I wouldn't be happy by writing my resignation letter. I would only make some people out there laugh their asses off and I would just be a villain so I choose to stay.

How to cope with all the craps?

Hmmm.. I suggest you to have someone you can trust to. To share all your stories and to ease your pain. Residency is a mini reality of the world. As in the real life you can't make everyone happy, in this absurd world you can't either. Here you'll find a best friend, a colleague, an enemy, and a hater. The key is to face it with wisdom. Slowly but sure you'll learn about which things you have to take seriously and which ones you should let go.

If there's one thing you have to keep in mind is there's no comfortable learning process in this world. As long as you're a student, insecurity will always haunt you. So be brave and remember why you choose this way at the very first.

As a student I struggle a lot too. But those struggling often sends me to one contemplation to another and makes me know who I am and what I need. What else can be more important than that?


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