Life is hard..
It's bitter, sometimes sweet. But most of time it's bitter..
You can choose the way to face it. Either seriously or not.
Me? I choose the latter. Not because I'm not a serious one but it's a principle. It's so exhausting when you have to face everything seriously. Although maybe people will think that you're a wise person. But for me, I don't need a hundred people calling me wise. I just need to be happy.
Sarcastic comment always make me feel better. Some people take it seriously and make me feel uncomfortable. But I can't blame them too. Everyone comes from different place. It influences them much.
But for me, the more sarcastic it is, the better it would be. Since sometimes people out there do something unimportant and make everyone else angry. I don't like to show my anger but yes I like sarcastic comment better than anything else!
Selasa, 30 November 2010
Jumat, 26 November 2010
I Will Never Stop to Try It
One thing that I always wish in this life is being someone who can give something to the world. Not to change the world or make a history but to show my gratitude to the Creator. I always believe that God creates us for a reason and it’s our job to find that reason.
I used to think that someone who can give something to the world is someone who never or barely fails. And based on that understanding, i started to see myself. I found that I fell down so many times. I’ve ever been on top though but no one cares about your success when you fall down. You must know what I saw then.. I was only an ordinary little girl. No special thing about me.
But the best teacher in this world is the great people. I mean the real great people. Ones that always know how to be optimist, see themselves clearly, and always think twice to blame somebody else. They teach me that no matter how many times you fall down or feel like an idiot, you will always be you. I have to say this sentence loudly to myself... ‘I WILL ALWAYS BE ME’. The point is basically we were created same, with eyes to see, ears to hear, heart to pump the blood, and brain to think. What makes us different is the experience. Experience to be on the lowest and highest place, also the feeling to be in the middle. If Valentino didn’t fall so many times in his first season of GP500cc, he wouldn’t be the champion in the next season. But he always tries and I ALSO DON'T WANNA STOP TO TRY!
When you fall down, you learn how to stand up again in a better way. This is what I'm trying hard to learn now. Sometimes the system makes everything become so difficult and all you have to do is handling it well or at least trying to survive in the best way you can do. Life is a mystery. I lay my life on God’s hands. I don't wanna underestimate or overestimate myself anymore. Life becomes greater when we stop to take too much and start to give as much as we can.
I used to think that someone who can give something to the world is someone who never or barely fails. And based on that understanding, i started to see myself. I found that I fell down so many times. I’ve ever been on top though but no one cares about your success when you fall down. You must know what I saw then.. I was only an ordinary little girl. No special thing about me.
But the best teacher in this world is the great people. I mean the real great people. Ones that always know how to be optimist, see themselves clearly, and always think twice to blame somebody else. They teach me that no matter how many times you fall down or feel like an idiot, you will always be you. I have to say this sentence loudly to myself... ‘I WILL ALWAYS BE ME’. The point is basically we were created same, with eyes to see, ears to hear, heart to pump the blood, and brain to think. What makes us different is the experience. Experience to be on the lowest and highest place, also the feeling to be in the middle. If Valentino didn’t fall so many times in his first season of GP500cc, he wouldn’t be the champion in the next season. But he always tries and I ALSO DON'T WANNA STOP TO TRY!
When you fall down, you learn how to stand up again in a better way. This is what I'm trying hard to learn now. Sometimes the system makes everything become so difficult and all you have to do is handling it well or at least trying to survive in the best way you can do. Life is a mystery. I lay my life on God’s hands. I don't wanna underestimate or overestimate myself anymore. Life becomes greater when we stop to take too much and start to give as much as we can.
Leaving
Watching the clock on the wall
Been a while since you’ve called
I cant help but wait
It’s late and i cant get into sleep
Something’s different this time
It just doesnt feel right
Have we broken in two?
Am i really gonna lose you tonight?
You come walking in
Tears in your eyes
Pretending like its alright
But i know you’re leaving
I know that smile
I can tell you’ve been crying
You’re gonna say goodbye
I wish i could stop you but you’ve made up your mind
I beg you dont go
But i already know you’re leaving
Where does the time go?
Between goodbye and hello
How did we come to this? Is there something we missed
Along the way
With your bag at the door
I wanna pull you in close
And hold you once more even though
Chorus
Here comes the sleepless nights
Here comes the tears im gonna cry
Here comes the last goodbye leaving us behind
Oh this cant be right
Chorus to end
One thing I never like in this life is saying goodbye. We often use that word everyday though. Parents go to work, children go to school, children go home from school, end up conversation with boyfriend on phone at night, finish the lecture or party, etc. For them above, we always say goodbye. So, whats the point then? I say it everyday but i never like goodbye. Is it only because I see it from different point of view? Maybe. Sometimes a word feels stronger when we put a tension on it. You know, how many ‘hello’ do we say everyday? And can u still feel the difference between the usual hello and hello to an old friend that u havent met for a long time? Or maybe with ur ex boyfriend? I bet the sensation is much different and so is with goodbye.
Mr. Goodbye is one of my favorite Korean dramas. It was a sad ending drama. I cried a lot when i watched it. The dying man in this film never said goodbye directly to his girlfriend. In his heart, he wanted to stay for one more hour to be with his lover. This story is much different with the one that I recently read. I have just read Tuesdays with Morrie. Morrie wasnt afraid to say goodbye and he did it in a special way. He put Mitch’s hand on his chest, right on his heart, and said ‘this is goodbye’. Well, I know that u can see the difference. Hyun Seoh wanted to live as he had found what he’d been longing for whereas Morrie was so willing to let his soul go since he had enjoyed his own life. There are many ways to leave this world but for me there are only 2 choices. You can beg for a bit longer life or you accept ur death without fighting.
I always wanna be Morrie. I wanna die without regret. Morrie shew me the way. In order to get a willingness like he once had, I have to enjoy every breathe that I take. It seems so cliche, easy, and ignored but if you really do it, you will know that Morrie was right. Well, i’ll make it simple. Have you ever thought to go back to the past? Have u ever envied someone younger? If so, ask to yourself then, why? For me, I also ever felt the same, it was because I felt that there was something missing in my past. One thing that I wasnt brave enough to do. Something that I never ask clearly to someone. Something that I could’ve never had again. One thing that I always feel sorry for till today. And that something missing has made me to be someone like Hyun Seoh. I substitute something I never have with something else and it doesnt satisfy me in any way. I think I’ve become frozen for some things. For exampe, I never let myself give a second chance for man. How pity I am.
I know its hard to pure myself anymore. But I still have choices for the way I die and I’ve decided to die without regret. The way I leave must be the best way I can do. So from now on, I promise to myself to enjoy every second I have. I havent been able to make it perfectly yet but we’re all learning. Dont get me wrong, I’m not depressed ;p. I just wanna tell you that death isnt that evil, it can be a present for some people. And i wanna be a part of those lucky people.
Byeee.. See you later!
Been a while since you’ve called
I cant help but wait
It’s late and i cant get into sleep
Something’s different this time
It just doesnt feel right
Have we broken in two?
Am i really gonna lose you tonight?
You come walking in
Tears in your eyes
Pretending like its alright
But i know you’re leaving
I know that smile
I can tell you’ve been crying
You’re gonna say goodbye
I wish i could stop you but you’ve made up your mind
I beg you dont go
But i already know you’re leaving
Where does the time go?
Between goodbye and hello
How did we come to this? Is there something we missed
Along the way
With your bag at the door
I wanna pull you in close
And hold you once more even though
Chorus
Here comes the sleepless nights
Here comes the tears im gonna cry
Here comes the last goodbye leaving us behind
Oh this cant be right
Chorus to end
One thing I never like in this life is saying goodbye. We often use that word everyday though. Parents go to work, children go to school, children go home from school, end up conversation with boyfriend on phone at night, finish the lecture or party, etc. For them above, we always say goodbye. So, whats the point then? I say it everyday but i never like goodbye. Is it only because I see it from different point of view? Maybe. Sometimes a word feels stronger when we put a tension on it. You know, how many ‘hello’ do we say everyday? And can u still feel the difference between the usual hello and hello to an old friend that u havent met for a long time? Or maybe with ur ex boyfriend? I bet the sensation is much different and so is with goodbye.
Mr. Goodbye is one of my favorite Korean dramas. It was a sad ending drama. I cried a lot when i watched it. The dying man in this film never said goodbye directly to his girlfriend. In his heart, he wanted to stay for one more hour to be with his lover. This story is much different with the one that I recently read. I have just read Tuesdays with Morrie. Morrie wasnt afraid to say goodbye and he did it in a special way. He put Mitch’s hand on his chest, right on his heart, and said ‘this is goodbye’. Well, I know that u can see the difference. Hyun Seoh wanted to live as he had found what he’d been longing for whereas Morrie was so willing to let his soul go since he had enjoyed his own life. There are many ways to leave this world but for me there are only 2 choices. You can beg for a bit longer life or you accept ur death without fighting.
I always wanna be Morrie. I wanna die without regret. Morrie shew me the way. In order to get a willingness like he once had, I have to enjoy every breathe that I take. It seems so cliche, easy, and ignored but if you really do it, you will know that Morrie was right. Well, i’ll make it simple. Have you ever thought to go back to the past? Have u ever envied someone younger? If so, ask to yourself then, why? For me, I also ever felt the same, it was because I felt that there was something missing in my past. One thing that I wasnt brave enough to do. Something that I never ask clearly to someone. Something that I could’ve never had again. One thing that I always feel sorry for till today. And that something missing has made me to be someone like Hyun Seoh. I substitute something I never have with something else and it doesnt satisfy me in any way. I think I’ve become frozen for some things. For exampe, I never let myself give a second chance for man. How pity I am.
I know its hard to pure myself anymore. But I still have choices for the way I die and I’ve decided to die without regret. The way I leave must be the best way I can do. So from now on, I promise to myself to enjoy every second I have. I havent been able to make it perfectly yet but we’re all learning. Dont get me wrong, I’m not depressed ;p. I just wanna tell you that death isnt that evil, it can be a present for some people. And i wanna be a part of those lucky people.
Byeee.. See you later!
Rabu, 27 Oktober 2010
My fave note ;D
God didn't promise days without pain,
laughter without sorrow,
sun without rain,
but God did promise strength for the day,
comfort for the tears,
and light for the way
Disappointments are like road humps,
they slow you down a bit,
but you enjoy the smooth road afterward,
don't stay on the humps too long. Move on!
When you feel down because you didn't get what you want,
just sit tight and be happy
because God is thinking of something better to give you
When something happens to you, good or bad, consider what it means
There's a purpose to life's events, to teach you how to laugh more
or not to cry too hard
You can't make someone loves you
all you can do is being someone who can be loved
the rest is up to the person to realize your worth
The measure of love is when you love without measure.
In life there are very rare chances
that you'll meet the person you love and loves you in return
So once you have it, don't ever let go,
the chance might never come your way again
It's better to lose your pride to the one you love,
than to lose the one you love because of pride
We spend too much time looking for the right person to love
or finding fault with those we already love
when instead we should be perfecting the love we give
When you truly care for someone,
you don't look for faults,
you don't look for answers,
you don't look for mistakes,
Instead,
you fight the mistakes,
you accept the faults,
and you overlook the excuses
Never abandon an old friend
You will never find one who can take his place
Friendship is like wine, it gets better as it grows older
laughter without sorrow,
sun without rain,
but God did promise strength for the day,
comfort for the tears,
and light for the way
Disappointments are like road humps,
they slow you down a bit,
but you enjoy the smooth road afterward,
don't stay on the humps too long. Move on!
When you feel down because you didn't get what you want,
just sit tight and be happy
because God is thinking of something better to give you
When something happens to you, good or bad, consider what it means
There's a purpose to life's events, to teach you how to laugh more
or not to cry too hard
You can't make someone loves you
all you can do is being someone who can be loved
the rest is up to the person to realize your worth
The measure of love is when you love without measure.
In life there are very rare chances
that you'll meet the person you love and loves you in return
So once you have it, don't ever let go,
the chance might never come your way again
It's better to lose your pride to the one you love,
than to lose the one you love because of pride
We spend too much time looking for the right person to love
or finding fault with those we already love
when instead we should be perfecting the love we give
When you truly care for someone,
you don't look for faults,
you don't look for answers,
you don't look for mistakes,
Instead,
you fight the mistakes,
you accept the faults,
and you overlook the excuses
Never abandon an old friend
You will never find one who can take his place
Friendship is like wine, it gets better as it grows older
Selasa, 20 April 2010
why why why... love is so complicated..
I dedicate this to someone.. maybe the most precious one for me..
There's one thing that i wanna ask u..
do u still feel the heartbeating or lil bit of happiness whenever u receive my message?
In fact, i still feel that so.. then right after ur first message, i always want more n i'll send u a message again with the question that i think u'd be excited to reply...
Huhhhh..
Am I too stupid?
Why did I allow u stealing my heart long ago?
Why didn't I let u go at the first time u came?
n the best question of all is..
Y ARE U STILL IN MY HEART?
I've ever said that i've forgotten u olredi by getting over our memories but do u have the best answer to explain this hearbeating?
I dont know whether it still takes any longer time to let u go..
I'm so tired being like this.. I never wanna wait for you..
but my lymbic system and my 38th Broadmann area still ask me to feel the feeling that i once ever had for u n remember u..
I miss the way we were when we were walking together to school..
Please tell me, either thru dream or message, what u feel n what u want as I wonder about them..
There's one thing that i wanna ask u..
do u still feel the heartbeating or lil bit of happiness whenever u receive my message?
In fact, i still feel that so.. then right after ur first message, i always want more n i'll send u a message again with the question that i think u'd be excited to reply...
Huhhhh..
Am I too stupid?
Why did I allow u stealing my heart long ago?
Why didn't I let u go at the first time u came?
n the best question of all is..
Y ARE U STILL IN MY HEART?
I've ever said that i've forgotten u olredi by getting over our memories but do u have the best answer to explain this hearbeating?
I dont know whether it still takes any longer time to let u go..
I'm so tired being like this.. I never wanna wait for you..
but my lymbic system and my 38th Broadmann area still ask me to feel the feeling that i once ever had for u n remember u..
I miss the way we were when we were walking together to school..
Please tell me, either thru dream or message, what u feel n what u want as I wonder about them..
Rabu, 03 Februari 2010
my very bestfriends
it's such a very nice thing to know that some people care about me and here they aaarrrreeeeee..
starting from d eldest one hehe..
madir (irmadani apriningrum)... the blue ranger.. i always wonder y she can be my bestfriend hehehe.. eniwei, aku kenal dia pas kelas 1 smp.. kalem gitu anaknya.. such a sweet gal with long hair.. okelah pokoknya.. ga ada tanda2 klo she's a very abnormal one.. Kelas 2 smp dia potong rambut n like a domino effect, semua kepribadiannya terbukaaaa haha.. Sekarang she's crazy abt queen Seon Deok n acts as if she were the Queen haha..
ika-dear (ika prawita sari)... the yellow mellow sweet gal hehehe.. she's my eldest dearest sista for me.. kadir ni ada di semua 'social society' yang pernah aku masuki,, starting fr POGB, GT2M, 4 sekawan 3J, n gs3.. So, no wonder if i miss her soooo muuuccccccchhhhhhhhh..
tris-dear (trisna wulansari)... the black with a pure white heart.. she's a woman and a man at the same time.. the gs3's bodyguard n my sista in Nate's fam.. aku sekelas ma tris-dear waktu kelas XI.. huhu.. i miss my 11th classmates now.. i remember klo qta sering makan bareng.. asoy bgt dah sambil ngeliatin c domi adu mulut ma eci, arie nyanyi2 ga jelas, meli pacaran ma koko, cie cie ubu foto2 ma olan, de el el.. n qta berdua makan dengan cantiknya sambil ngereview cerita film 'jewel in the palace' malam sebelumnya hihihihi..
lhala-dear (maulani faradina salilana)... the red one.. anggota gs3 yang paling centil hahaha.. she's now here in yk with me n one thing i'm sure is that she looooooovvvvvvvvvvvveeeeeeeeeeeessssssssssss me so much and so do I hehe.. klo ceritaan ma lhala tuh ya ga jauh2 dari masalah get married, wisata kuliner, ma tiket yk-smd yang selalu ada di tangan jauh sebelum libur haha.. she's an MC, photographer, n gs3's archie..
nichi, my mother (nichita heryananda putri).. she loves orange and she's my mother.. bisa dibilang dia yang paling dewasa dan paling bijak di antara kami tapi dia juga yang paling hobi nemuin hal2 lucu yg bikin gs3 beda.. nichi ini artisnya gs3 lhooo..
ndhul (rindha maretha kusumawatie).. sometimes aku bingung kenapa di antara sekian banyak warna, ndul suka warna ungu?? eniwei, dia senasib ma aku kalo soal keluar rumah.. kami anak pingitan haha...
amink (muhaemin nur achmad) n faisal (abdul madjid faisal).. 2 cowok ni punya kepribadian berbeda.. amink orangnya moody tapi care whereas faisal is a troublemaker hihihi..
ida (asnidar rahman).. ida ni bukan anggota gs3 tapi dia bestfrenku sejak smp.. di yang nyimpen semua aib dan first love story-ku hihihi..
mimin (minda wulandari).. she's my keeper.. sekarang di yk juga ma aku hehe..
didi (diaz).. cicit nate's fam
ubu (trisna widyani).. ini kakakku yang nomor 2, kembarannya tris-dear. She's also my chinese language teacher hehe.. sekarang dia lagi di china.. huhu,, miss her so..
m. radinal pascari (domi).. referensi KD terlengkap.. klo kita dah ngumpul di yk n ga ada domi, dijamin ga heboh.. domi ni juga nyambi jadi tukang pijat n facial kita2 hihihi...
eci (desy ariani).. si cantik yg ketawanya heboh..
arie (arie mirza).. i have no word to say about him hihihihi..
anggi (anggriani profita).. nah dia ini sahabatku sejak kelas 2 smp,, makin lengket pas kelas 3 smp. sayangnya qta ga 1 sma tapi howeva,, the party hasn't ended yet.. we still stay connected until now.. many things happen between us but i hope our friendship will last forever :)
nda (hendra).. klo tadi aku bingung mau ngomong apa tentang arie karena aku cuma bisa geleng2 kepala ngeliat kelakuan anak itu, sekarang aku juga bingung mau ngomong apa tentang hendra karena he's more than words for me.. i call our friendship as 'friendship in the making' coz our friendship process really takes a very long time.. he's my friend in everything n he's the best 1 to gamble with haha.. we can talk anything from a very small unimportant thing until a very serious one.. it's always fun with him ;p
ooo.. i'm blessed very berry much with ya ol...
starting from d eldest one hehe..
madir (irmadani apriningrum)... the blue ranger.. i always wonder y she can be my bestfriend hehehe.. eniwei, aku kenal dia pas kelas 1 smp.. kalem gitu anaknya.. such a sweet gal with long hair.. okelah pokoknya.. ga ada tanda2 klo she's a very abnormal one.. Kelas 2 smp dia potong rambut n like a domino effect, semua kepribadiannya terbukaaaa haha.. Sekarang she's crazy abt queen Seon Deok n acts as if she were the Queen haha..
ika-dear (ika prawita sari)... the yellow mellow sweet gal hehehe.. she's my eldest dearest sista for me.. kadir ni ada di semua 'social society' yang pernah aku masuki,, starting fr POGB, GT2M, 4 sekawan 3J, n gs3.. So, no wonder if i miss her soooo muuuccccccchhhhhhhhh..
tris-dear (trisna wulansari)... the black with a pure white heart.. she's a woman and a man at the same time.. the gs3's bodyguard n my sista in Nate's fam.. aku sekelas ma tris-dear waktu kelas XI.. huhu.. i miss my 11th classmates now.. i remember klo qta sering makan bareng.. asoy bgt dah sambil ngeliatin c domi adu mulut ma eci, arie nyanyi2 ga jelas, meli pacaran ma koko, cie cie ubu foto2 ma olan, de el el.. n qta berdua makan dengan cantiknya sambil ngereview cerita film 'jewel in the palace' malam sebelumnya hihihihi..
lhala-dear (maulani faradina salilana)... the red one.. anggota gs3 yang paling centil hahaha.. she's now here in yk with me n one thing i'm sure is that she looooooovvvvvvvvvvvveeeeeeeeeeeessssssssssss me so much and so do I hehe.. klo ceritaan ma lhala tuh ya ga jauh2 dari masalah get married, wisata kuliner, ma tiket yk-smd yang selalu ada di tangan jauh sebelum libur haha.. she's an MC, photographer, n gs3's archie..
nichi, my mother (nichita heryananda putri).. she loves orange and she's my mother.. bisa dibilang dia yang paling dewasa dan paling bijak di antara kami tapi dia juga yang paling hobi nemuin hal2 lucu yg bikin gs3 beda.. nichi ini artisnya gs3 lhooo..
ndhul (rindha maretha kusumawatie).. sometimes aku bingung kenapa di antara sekian banyak warna, ndul suka warna ungu?? eniwei, dia senasib ma aku kalo soal keluar rumah.. kami anak pingitan haha...
amink (muhaemin nur achmad) n faisal (abdul madjid faisal).. 2 cowok ni punya kepribadian berbeda.. amink orangnya moody tapi care whereas faisal is a troublemaker hihihi..
ida (asnidar rahman).. ida ni bukan anggota gs3 tapi dia bestfrenku sejak smp.. di yang nyimpen semua aib dan first love story-ku hihihi..
mimin (minda wulandari).. she's my keeper.. sekarang di yk juga ma aku hehe..
didi (diaz).. cicit nate's fam
ubu (trisna widyani).. ini kakakku yang nomor 2, kembarannya tris-dear. She's also my chinese language teacher hehe.. sekarang dia lagi di china.. huhu,, miss her so..
m. radinal pascari (domi).. referensi KD terlengkap.. klo kita dah ngumpul di yk n ga ada domi, dijamin ga heboh.. domi ni juga nyambi jadi tukang pijat n facial kita2 hihihi...
eci (desy ariani).. si cantik yg ketawanya heboh..
arie (arie mirza).. i have no word to say about him hihihihi..
anggi (anggriani profita).. nah dia ini sahabatku sejak kelas 2 smp,, makin lengket pas kelas 3 smp. sayangnya qta ga 1 sma tapi howeva,, the party hasn't ended yet.. we still stay connected until now.. many things happen between us but i hope our friendship will last forever :)
nda (hendra).. klo tadi aku bingung mau ngomong apa tentang arie karena aku cuma bisa geleng2 kepala ngeliat kelakuan anak itu, sekarang aku juga bingung mau ngomong apa tentang hendra karena he's more than words for me.. i call our friendship as 'friendship in the making' coz our friendship process really takes a very long time.. he's my friend in everything n he's the best 1 to gamble with haha.. we can talk anything from a very small unimportant thing until a very serious one.. it's always fun with him ;p
ooo.. i'm blessed very berry much with ya ol...
Rabu, 13 Januari 2010
Never Knew I Needed
for the way you changed my plans
for being the perfect distraction
for the way you took the idea that i have
of everything that i wanted to have
and made me see there was something missing
for the ending of my first begin
and for the rare and unexpected friend
for the way you’re something that i never choose
but at the same time something i don’t wanna lose
and never wanna be without ever again
my accidental happily (ever after)
the way you smile and how you comfort me (with your laughter)
i must admit you were not a part of my book
but now if you open it up and take a look
you’re the beginning and the end of every chapter
who’d knew that i’d be here
so unexpectedly
undeniablely happy
said with you right here, right here next to me
girl you’re the..
you’re the best thing i never knew i needed
so when you were here i had no idea
you’re the best thing i never knew i needed
so now it’s so clear i need you here always
baby baby
now it’s so clear i need you here always
you’re the best thing i never knew i needed
so when you were here i had no idea
you’re the best thing i never knew i needed
so now it’s so clear i need you here always
for being the perfect distraction
for the way you took the idea that i have
of everything that i wanted to have
and made me see there was something missing
for the ending of my first begin
and for the rare and unexpected friend
for the way you’re something that i never choose
but at the same time something i don’t wanna lose
and never wanna be without ever again
my accidental happily (ever after)
the way you smile and how you comfort me (with your laughter)
i must admit you were not a part of my book
but now if you open it up and take a look
you’re the beginning and the end of every chapter
who’d knew that i’d be here
so unexpectedly
undeniablely happy
said with you right here, right here next to me
girl you’re the..
you’re the best thing i never knew i needed
so when you were here i had no idea
you’re the best thing i never knew i needed
so now it’s so clear i need you here always
baby baby
now it’s so clear i need you here always
you’re the best thing i never knew i needed
so when you were here i had no idea
you’re the best thing i never knew i needed
so now it’s so clear i need you here always
Selasa, 05 Januari 2010
the world i live in
the world i live in..
isn't as pretty as i saw when i was child
but it still gives me its best since as God's promise..
isn't as pretty as i saw when i was child
but it still gives me its best since as God's promise..
Langganan:
Postingan (Atom)